<\/p>\n\n\n\n
(Bu yaz\u0131n\u0131n okunma s\u00fcresi yakla\u015f\u0131k olarak 3 dakikad\u0131r.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u0130nsan \u00e7o\u011fu zaman kendi ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131n en zor, en a\u011f\u0131r oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. Ba\u015f\u0131na gelen<\/p>\n\n\n\n
bir olay, kalbini k\u0131ran bir s\u00f6z ya da i\u00e7ini yava\u015f yava\u015f kemiren bir yaln\u0131zl\u0131k\u2026 Bunlar insana<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00f6yle b\u00fcy\u00fck g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr ki bazen d\u00fcnyada kimsenin ayn\u0131 duygular\u0131 ya\u015famad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 san\u0131rs\u0131n. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ac\u0131, d\u0131\u015far\u0131dan bak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda de\u011fil, insan\u0131n kalbinin en derin yerinde hissedildi\u011finde ger\u00e7ek<\/p>\n\n\n\n
a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6sterir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ki\u015fi bazen sessizce ta\u015f\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131 duygular\u0131n alt\u0131nda ezildi\u011fini hisseder; anlatamad\u0131\u011f\u0131,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
kimseye tam olarak tarif edemedi\u011fi bir y\u00fck gibi b\u00fcy\u00fcr i\u00e7inde. O anlarda insan\u0131n kalbi, kendi<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ac\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n d\u00fcnyadaki en b\u00fcy\u00fck ac\u0131 oldu\u011funa kolayca inan\u0131r. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc herkes hayat\u0131 kendi<\/p>\n\n\n\n
kalbinden ge\u00e7en duygular kadar bilir ve \u00e7o\u011fu zaman ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6r\u00fcnmeyen yaralar\u0131n\u0131 fark<\/p>\n\n\n\n
etmek sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zdan \u00e7ok daha zordur.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ama insan biraz durup d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcnce \u015funu fark eder: Her kalbin ta\u015f\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131 y\u00fck, onu ta\u015f\u0131yan<\/p>\n\n\n\n
i\u00e7in en a\u011f\u0131r oland\u0131r. Bir ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n hayat\u0131na uzaktan bakmak kolay olabilir. \u0130nsan bazen<\/p>\n\n\n\n
fark\u0131nda olmadan ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n ac\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 da k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcmseyebilir. \u201cGe\u00e7er\u201d, \u201cal\u0131\u015f\u0131rs\u0131n\u201d, \u201czaman her \u015feyi<\/p>\n\n\n\n
iyile\u015ftirir\u201d demek zaten en basitidir. Ama o duygunun i\u00e7inde ya\u015fayan biri i\u00e7in zaman<\/p>\n\n\n\n
bamba\u015fka i\u015fler. Dakikalar uzar, geceler a\u011f\u0131rla\u015f\u0131r, d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceler durmadan insan\u0131n zihninin<\/p>\n\n\n\n
etraf\u0131nda d\u00f6nmeye ba\u015flar. \u00dcstelik bazen insan en \u00e7ok anla\u015f\u0131lmak istedi\u011fi anda, kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndaki<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ki\u015fi kendi derdini anlatmaya ba\u015flar; sanki bir yar\u0131\u015f i\u00e7erisindeymi\u015f gibi \u201cbenim de \u015fuyum var\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
diyerek o an\u0131n a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hafifletmek yerine durumu daha da zorla\u015ft\u0131r\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Mesela\u2026 Sen hi\u00e7 geceleri birden akl\u0131na s\u0131zan, zihnini ele ge\u00e7iren ve seni neredeyse<\/p>\n\n\n\n
uykusuz b\u0131rakacak olan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerle ba\u015f ba\u015fa kald\u0131n m\u0131? Herkes uyurken zihninin susmad\u0131\u011f\u0131<\/p>\n\n\n\n
geceleri ya\u015fad\u0131n m\u0131? Ya da her g\u00fcn gece olup kendi kendine kalman\u0131n sana a\u011f\u0131r geldi\u011fi<\/p>\n\n\n\n
zamanlar oldu mu? G\u00fcn do\u011fsun diye saatleri sayd\u0131n m\u0131? Kimsenin seni ger\u00e7ekten<\/p>\n\n\n\n
anlayamayaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn, i\u00e7indeki o karanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n yava\u015f yava\u015f b\u00fcy\u00fcd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc hissetti\u011fin<\/p>\n\n\n\n
anlar\u2026 Korkarak uyudu\u011fun geceler oldu mu? \u0130\u015fte t\u00fcm bu anlar, hayat\u0131n sadece bir yar\u0131\u015ftan<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ibaret olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 anlat\u0131yor asl\u0131nda bize.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bu konuyla ba\u011flant\u0131l\u0131, arkada\u015f\u0131m benimle komik bir an\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 payla\u015fm\u0131\u015ft\u0131: \u2018Bir gece yine<\/p>\n\n\n\n
bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerle bo\u011fu\u015furken nefes almakta zorland\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum,\u2019 demi\u015fti. \u2018Yaz\u0131n s\u0131cak<\/p>\n\n\n\n
bir gecesiydi; odan\u0131n i\u00e7i dar gelmi\u015fti, sanki duvarlar \u00fczerime geliyordu. Biraz olsun<\/p>\n\n\n\n
rahatlayabilmek i\u00e7in balkona \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131m. A\u00e7\u0131k havan\u0131n y\u00fcz\u00fcme de\u011fmesi, gecenin sessizli\u011fi veserin r\u00fczg\u00e2r bana iyi gelmi\u015fti. Bir s\u00fcre sonra balkondaki koltu\u011fa uzan\u0131p orada uyumaya karar<\/p>\n\n\n\n
verdim. Babam gece uyan\u0131p beni odamda ve di\u011fer odalarda bulamay\u0131nca evden habersiz<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00e7\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 san\u0131p korkmu\u015f. Sonra balkonda oldu\u011fumu g\u00f6r\u00fcnce rahatlam\u0131\u015f tabi. Sabah bunu<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00f6\u011frendi\u011fimde hem \u015fa\u015f\u0131rm\u0131\u015f hem de istemsizce g\u00fclm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcm.\u2019 dedi. \u2018O a\u011f\u0131r d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerin<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ortas\u0131nda bile hayat bazen b\u00f6yle k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck ve komik anlar b\u0131rakabiliyor.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
O an\u0131y\u0131 dinledikten sonra \u015funu fark ettim: \u0130nsan bazen en a\u011f\u0131r d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerle<\/p>\n\n\n\n
bo\u011fu\u015furken bile hayat k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir sahne a\u00e7abiliyor. Bir balkon, serin bir r\u00fczg\u00e2r, uykuyla gelen<\/p>\n\n\n\n
k\u0131sa bir ka\u00e7\u0131\u015f\u2026 O an belki hi\u00e7bir \u015feyi tamamen d\u00fczeltmez ama insan\u0131n i\u00e7indeki d\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fc biraz<\/p>\n\n\n\n
gev\u015fetir. Sanki hayat, en karanl\u0131k an\u0131n i\u00e7inde bile \u201cburaday\u0131m\u201d diye k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir i\u015faret b\u0131rak\u0131r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u0130\u015fte tam da bu y\u00fczden kimsenin ne ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilmeden h\u00fck\u00fcm vermek bu kadar kolay<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ama bir o kadar da ac\u0131mas\u0131zcad\u0131r. \u0130nsanlar \u00e7o\u011fu zaman ac\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 anlatmaz; sadece susar, i\u00e7ine<\/p>\n\n\n\n
atar ve y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye devam eder. Birinin kahkahas\u0131 belki bir \u015feyleri saklamak i\u00e7indir, sessizli\u011fi<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ise kimseye anlatamad\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir y\u00fck\u00fcn a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131d\u0131r. Ac\u0131lar\u0131 yar\u0131\u015ft\u0131rmak, \u201cbenimki daha zor\u201d demek<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ya da birinin y\u00fck\u00fcn\u00fc k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcmsemek\u2026 Bunlar\u0131n hi\u00e7biri kimseyi ger\u00e7ekten anlamaya<\/p>\n\n\n\n
yakla\u015ft\u0131rmaz. Tam tersine durumu daha zor bir hale getirebilir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
K\u0131sacas\u0131 bir ki\u015fi g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcyor, belki de kahkaha at\u0131yor diye onun mutlu oldu\u011funu<\/p>\n\n\n\n
varsayamazs\u0131n\u0131z. \u00c7o\u011fu zaman kimse o ac\u0131y\u0131, i\u00e7lerindeki karanl\u0131\u011f\u0131, k\u0131r\u0131k umutlar\u0131 ve yaln\u0131z<\/p>\n\n\n\n
geceleri fark edemez. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc baz\u0131 g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015fler, sessiz sava\u015flarda tak\u0131lan bir maskedir. Ger\u00e7ek<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n mutluluk, yaln\u0131zca dudaklar\u0131n k\u0131vr\u0131lmas\u0131ndan de\u011fil, g\u00f6zlerin i\u00e7indeki \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131da kendini ele verir,<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n g\u00f6zler kalbin ger\u00e7e\u011fini er ya da ge\u00e7 f\u0131s\u0131ldar.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Yazar: Melisa Deniz<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc baz\u0131 g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015fler, sessiz sava\u015flarda tak\u0131lan bir maskedir. Ger\u00e7ek
\nmutluluk, yaln\u0131zca dudaklar\u0131n k\u0131vr\u0131lmas\u0131ndan de\u011fil, g\u00f6zlerin i\u00e7indeki \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131da kendini ele verir,
\ng\u00f6zler kalbin ger\u00e7e\u011fini er ya da ge\u00e7 f\u0131s\u0131ldar.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6396,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,4,1],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n