(Bu yaz\u0131n\u0131n okunmas\u0131 yakla\u015f\u0131k 2 dakika s\u00fcrmektedir.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ucu buca\u011f\u0131 olmayan bir bu\u011fday tarlas\u0131n\u0131n tam ortas\u0131ndayd\u0131 kad\u0131n. Sar\u0131 ba\u015faklar\u0131n boy verdi\u011fi, her birinin r\u00fczgar\u0131n dans\u0131na nas\u0131l b\u00fcy\u00fck bir co\u015fkuyla e\u015flik etti\u011fine \u015fahit oluyordu. Bir an da i\u00e7inde do\u011fan bir istek \u00fczerine kendisini ba\u015faklar\u0131n kollar\u0131na b\u0131rakt\u0131 ve sonsuz mavili\u011fe a\u00e7t\u0131 g\u00f6zlerini. Ku\u015flar, \u00fcst\u00fcnde adeta pervane misali ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u00fcyordu kad\u0131n\u0131n. Bulutlar\u0131 yolculuyordu uzaklara do\u011fru ve gelenleri selaml\u0131yordu i\u00e7tenlikle. G\u00fcne\u015f ise tenini yal\u0131yordu usulca, \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 hi\u00e7 sak\u0131nmadan kad\u0131n\u0131n sa\u00e7lar\u0131yla payla\u015f\u0131yor ve yerini yava\u015f yava\u015f ak\u015fam y\u0131ld\u0131z\u0131na b\u0131rakmak i\u00e7in haz\u0131rlan\u0131yordu. R\u00fczgar, ak\u015fam\u00fcst\u00fc esintisiyle beraber e\u015fi benzeri olmayan \u00e7i\u00e7eklerin kokular\u0131n\u0131 ta\u015f\u0131yordu kad\u0131na. Ke\u015fke bu kokuyu anlatabilseydi birisine ama ondan ba\u015fka kimse yoktu bu\u011fday tarlas\u0131nda, ta ki uzaktaki k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck kul\u00fcbeyi ke\u015ffedene kadar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ak\u015fam iyice etkisini g\u00f6sterdi\u011finde \u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 yanan kul\u00fcbeye yakla\u015ft\u0131 kad\u0131n. Ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131n s\u0131n\u0131rlar\u0131n\u0131 ihlal etti\u011fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnden biraz huzursuz, biraz da merak duygusuyla tahtadan yap\u0131lma kap\u0131ya vurdu usulca. Kap\u0131, g\u00f6zleri g\u00fclen ya\u015fl\u0131 bir kad\u0131n taraf\u0131ndan a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131. \u201cSen Tanr\u0131 misafirisin, \u00e7orbam s\u0131cak hadi gel.\u201d diyerek buyur etti tanr\u0131 misafiri kad\u0131n\u0131. Kad\u0131n, \u00e7ekingen tav\u0131rlarla odan\u0131n bir k\u00f6\u015fesinde beklemeye koyuldu. Kafas\u0131nda y\u00fczlerce d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnce dolan\u0131yordu; bir yandan da odan\u0131n i\u00e7erisindeki e\u015fyalar\u0131 ve bunlar\u0131n kim bilir nelere \u015fahit oldu\u011funu hesapl\u0131yordu kendince. Evin i\u00e7erisi bir hayli bak\u0131ms\u0131zd\u0131 fakat kad\u0131n\u0131n orada hissetti\u011fi s\u0131cakl\u0131k, d\u00fcnyan\u0131n en g\u00fczel e\u015fyalar\u0131yla d\u00f6\u015fenmi\u015f hi\u00e7bir evinde yoktur diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyordu. T\u00fcm bunlar olurken bir yandan da kad\u0131n\u0131n hareketlerini s\u00fcz\u00fcyordu. \u00c7orbalar\u0131 yava\u015f\u00e7a kaselere dolduran ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131n sorgu dolu g\u00f6zlerle bakm\u0131yordu kad\u0131na; sanki onu k\u0131rk y\u0131ld\u0131r tan\u0131yordu. Tekrardan sofras\u0131na buyur eden ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131n\u0131n bu nazik daveti, kad\u0131n taraf\u0131ndan kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k buldu ve iki \u00e7ift g\u00f6z birbirini s\u00fczerek \u00e7orbalar\u0131n\u0131 i\u00e7meye koyuldu. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sessizli\u011fi bozan kad\u0131n: <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cKim oldu\u011fumu, nereden geldi\u011fimi merak etmiyor musun?\u201d diye sordu ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131na hi\u00e7 teredd\u00fcts\u00fcz. Sanki bu sorunun ona y\u00f6neltilmesini bekleyen ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131n, dudaklar\u0131n\u0131n ucunda bir tebess\u00fcmle \u201cSen kendini anlatmadan benim sana soru sormam seni rahats\u0131z etmez miydi k\u0131z\u0131m?\u201d diyerek bu soruya kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131k verdi. Kad\u0131n, ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 cevab\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnde ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131na hak verdi ve \u00e7orbas\u0131n\u0131 yudumlamaya devam etti. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00c7orba bitip sofradan kalk\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda, kad\u0131n gitmek \u00fczere evden ayr\u0131lmaya haz\u0131rland\u0131. Bunun \u00fczerine ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131n \u201cGer\u00e7ekten kendini bulabildin mi?\u201d sorusunu y\u00f6neltti kad\u0131na. Bu soru kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda afallayan kad\u0131n, ne cevap verece\u011fini bilemeden kap\u0131n\u0131n e\u015fi\u011fine m\u0131h gibi \u00e7ak\u0131ld\u0131. Ya\u015fl\u0131 kad\u0131n devam etti s\u00f6zlerine:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBu kap\u0131y\u0131 \u00e7alan her ki\u015fi sordu\u011fum bu soru kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda ne yapaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilemeyi\u015finin getirdi\u011fi \u015fa\u015fk\u0131nl\u0131kla durdu o kap\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6n\u00fcnde. D\u00fcnyaya g\u00f6zlerimizi a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zdan beri aray\u0131\u015f i\u00e7erisindeyiz k\u0131z\u0131m; bir yere konumland\u0131ramad\u0131k\u00e7a kendimizi, aidiyet hissine varamad\u0131k\u00e7a kayboluyoruz kendimizde. Ya\u015fad\u0131klar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 kabullenemeyi\u015fimizdir ge\u00e7mi\u015fte ya\u015fatan bizleri. Ge\u00e7mi\u015fin b\u00fcy\u00fcs\u00fcne kap\u0131l\u0131p gidenler gelece\u011fin s\u0131n\u0131rs\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131yla y\u00fczle\u015fme f\u0131rsat\u0131n\u0131 ka\u00e7\u0131r\u0131yor. Gelecek belirsiz, gelecek bombo\u015f bir sayfa ama gel g\u00f6r ki \u015fu an \u015fekil veriyoruz o bombo\u015f sand\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z sayfalara. Ya\u015fam, ba\u015f\u0131 sonu belli iki noktal\u0131 bir \u00e7izgi; \u00e7izgiyi g\u00f6kku\u015fa\u011f\u0131 renkleriyle ya da k\u00f6m\u00fcr karas\u0131yla renklendirmek senin ellerinde. Sen, sana aitsin ve iki noktal\u0131 \u00e7izgi senin ellerinde \u015fekillenecek g\u00fczel k\u0131z\u0131m.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Terden s\u0131r\u0131ls\u0131klam olmu\u015f v\u00fccuduyla f\u0131rlad\u0131 yata\u011f\u0131ndan kad\u0131n. G\u00fcne\u015f, perdenin aras\u0131ndan bir yol bulup y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc yal\u0131yordu yine. \u015eehir, \u00e7oktan uyanm\u0131\u015f \u015fekilleniyordu insanlar\u0131n ellerinde. Kad\u0131n\u0131n dudaklar\u0131nda bir tebess\u00fcm, f\u0131s\u0131ldad\u0131 kendine:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSen, sana aitsin.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Yazar: Elif Ay\u00e7a \u00d6lmez<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Ya\u015fam, ba\u015f\u0131 sonu belli iki noktal\u0131 bir \u00e7izgi; \u00e7izgiyi g\u00f6kku\u015fa\u011f\u0131 renkleriyle ya da k\u00f6m\u00fcr karas\u0131yla renklendirmek senin ellerinde. Sen, sana aitsin ve iki noktal\u0131 \u00e7izgi senin ellerinde \u015fekillenecek.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":48,"featured_media":2276,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,4],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n