(Bu yaz\u0131n\u0131n okunma s\u00fcresi yakla\u015f\u0131k olarak 3 dakika s\u00fcrmektedir.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dolunay\u0131n yans\u0131mas\u0131n\u0131n, teninde yaratt\u0131\u011f\u0131 par\u0131ldamalar\u0131 e\u015fli\u011finde derin bir nefes ald\u0131, zihnindeki sesleri y\u00fcre\u011findeki \u00e7at\u0131rdamalar\u0131 \u00f6n\u00fcnde duran sayfalara ak\u0131tmadan \u00f6nce. Meltem misali havada gezinircesine, lo\u015f bir \u0131\u015f\u0131k olu\u015fturmu\u015ftu dolunay, karanl\u0131k ve havas\u0131z o k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcc\u00fck oda i\u00e7erisinde. Lo\u015f \u0131\u015f\u0131k gibi hissetmek \u00fczerine d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc ard\u0131ndan, lo\u015f bir \u0131\u015f\u0131k gibi hissetmek\u2026 Ya\u015famda att\u0131\u011f\u0131 her bir ad\u0131mda elinden geldi\u011fince anlar\u0131, bak\u0131\u015flar\u0131, tenleri ayd\u0131nlatmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015fmak fakat i\u00e7ten i\u00e7e hep bir eksiklik dal\u0131na tak\u0131l\u0131 kalmak, yetememek \u00fczerine\u2026 \u201cHay\u0131r, bu tuza\u011fa d\u00fc\u015fmemeliyim.\u201d diye irkildi kendi kendine, fark\u0131ndayd\u0131 \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc, hayat\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131kan insanlar\u0131n yetersizliklerinin kamuflaj\u0131 olarak omuzlar\u0131na b\u0131rak\u0131lan y\u00fcklerdi bu yetersizlik ve eksiklik hisleri.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ard\u0131ndan \u015fu c\u00fcmleler d\u00f6k\u00fcld\u00fc kaleminden:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSevgili benli\u011fim,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yorulmad\u0131n m\u0131 hi\u00e7 zihninin i\u00e7erisinde, seni mutsuzluk d\u00f6ng\u00fcs\u00fcne prangalayan o incitici seslere kulak asmaktan, hi\u00e7 yorulmad\u0131n m\u0131, yaralar\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015frol\u00fc olan fig\u00fcrlerin senin hakk\u0131ndaki d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerini tek ger\u00e7ekli\u011fin eylemekten? Peki ya, felaketin ard\u0131ndan yepyeni felaketler gelmesin diye susturuldu\u011fun anlar\u0131 \u015fimdiki zamana ta\u015f\u0131maktan y\u0131pranmad\u0131n m\u0131? <\/p>\n\n\n\n
De\u011fer verdi\u011fin insanlar, sanki k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcc\u00fck bir \u00e7ocu\u011fun elindeki en sevdi\u011fi oyunca\u011f\u0131 yere f\u0131rlatm\u0131\u015f misali seni yaralasalar bile s\u0131rf onlar\u0131n ya\u015fam\u0131 \u00e7\u0131kmaza s\u00fcr\u00fcklenmesin diye susmak zorunda hissetti\u011fin an\u0131lar\u0131n seni alt etmesine nas\u0131l izin verebiliyorsun? Zihninin i\u00e7indeki f\u0131s\u0131ldayan, g\u00f6\u011f\u00fcs kafesinin tam ortas\u0131ndaki bo\u015flu\u011fa m\u0131h gibi kaz\u0131nm\u0131\u015f, seni yerden yere vuran o sesler hangi ka\u00e7mak istedi\u011fin duygular\u0131n bir yan\u0131lsamas\u0131?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ah i\u00e7sel dengemin en de\u011ferli unsuru olman gerekirken yarg\u0131lanma korkusunu tek ger\u00e7ekli\u011fim haline getirerek sars\u0131nt\u0131lar abidesine d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fen benli\u011fim, o kadar \u00e7ok isterdim ki etraf\u0131na duvarlar \u00f6rerek seni korumay\u0131, insanlara “hay\u0131r” demesini bilerek seni kanatlar\u0131m alt\u0131na almay\u0131. Ya\u015fam\u0131\u015f oldu\u011fum adaletsizliklere hayk\u0131rarak seni g\u00f6zetebilmeyi en \u00e7ok da senin yok say\u0131lmana “dur” diyebilmek i\u00e7in m\u00fccadele edebilmeyi ve en k\u0131ymetli kazan\u0131m olarak her aynaya bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131mda veya kendimle her ba\u015f ba\u015fa kald\u0131\u011f\u0131mda seni sevebilmeyi…\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bir an duraksad\u0131, g\u00f6zlerinden hi\u00e7bir zaman ak\u0131tamad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ya\u015flar\u0131, sat\u0131rlara d\u00f6kt\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc fark etti. Duvarda as\u0131l\u0131 olan Gustav Klimmt\u2019in, The Kiss tablosundaki u\u00e7urumda filizlenen \u00e7i\u00e7eklere g\u00f6zleri tak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda y\u00fcz\u00fcnde umars\u0131z bir tebess\u00fcm olu\u015ftu<\/strong>. Son c\u00fcmleleri d\u00f6k\u00fcld\u00fc mektubuna hemen ard\u0131ndan;<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cBelki de art\u0131k nefes almaya devam etti\u011fim bu ser\u00fcvende birbirimizin ellerinden s\u0131ms\u0131k\u0131 tutar, birbirimizin incinmesini en aza indirgemeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r\u0131z, ne dersin? <\/p>\n\n\n\n -Y\u0131llard\u0131r seni ihmal eden dostun C.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Konuk Yazar: Ceren Yak\u0131c\u0131<\/p>\n\n\n\n G\u00f6rsel Kaynak: G\u00f6rsel yazara aittir.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Duvarda as\u0131l\u0131 olan Gustav Klimmt\u2019in, The Kiss tablosundaki u\u00e7urumda filizlenen \u00e7i\u00e7eklere g\u00f6zleri tak\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131nda y\u00fcz\u00fcnde umars\u0131z bir tebess\u00fcm olu\u015ftu<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":14,"featured_media":4692,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,4,1],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n