(Bu yaz\u0131n\u0131n okunma s\u00fcresi yakla\u015f\u0131k 3 dakikad\u0131r.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Zaman\u0131 durdurmak istedi\u011fimiz baz\u0131 \u2018an\u2019lar vard\u0131r, bir foto\u011fraf\u0131n i\u00e7inde \u00f6l\u00fcms\u00fczle\u015ftirmek istedi\u011fimiz, defalarca d\u00f6n\u00fcp d\u00f6n\u00fcp bakabilece\u011fimiz. Fakat an\u2019\u0131n b\u00fcy\u00fcs\u00fcne \u00f6yle kap\u0131l\u0131r\u0131z ki telefonu \u00e7\u0131kartmak, foto\u011fraf \u00e7ekmek akl\u0131m\u0131za bile gelmez. Oysa o foto\u011fraf \u00e7ekilse ve y\u0131llar sonra tozlu raflardan eski alb\u00fcmleri \u00e7\u0131kart\u0131p tekrar gidebilsek ke\u015fke o anlara.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cE\u011fer hik\u00e2yeyi s\u00f6zc\u00fcklerle anlatabilseydim, yan\u0131mda s\u00fcrekli bir foto\u011fraf makinesi ta\u015f\u0131maya ihtiya\u00e7 duymazd\u0131m.\u201d demi\u015f \u00fcnl\u00fc bir foto\u011fraf\u00e7\u0131. San\u0131r\u0131m s\u00f6zc\u00fcklerin anlatmaya yetmedi\u011fi ama kadrajlar\u0131n da zamana meydan okudu\u011fu anlardan bahsetmek istedi. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc foto\u011frafa bak\u0131nca hissetti\u011finiz duygu \u00f6yle kuvvetlidir ki ya\u015f\u0131n\u0131z ka\u00e7 olursa olsun ilk g\u00fcnk\u00fc heyecan\u0131yla hat\u0131rlars\u0131n\u0131z. Belki de bir koku hi\u00e7 unutmak istemedi\u011finiz ya da bir ses kula\u011f\u0131n\u0131zda yank\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 kaybetmemi\u015f; bakt\u0131k\u00e7a derinlere dalars\u0131n\u0131z, an\u0131lar birbiri ard\u0131na gelir ve bir bakm\u0131\u015fs\u0131n\u0131z saatlerdir ayn\u0131 foto\u011fraf elinizde. Foto\u011frafa kar\u015f\u0131 i\u00e7inizdekilere direnciniz k\u0131r\u0131l\u0131r, kendinizi foto\u011fraf\u0131n size an\u0131msatt\u0131\u011f\u0131 mutlulu\u011fa, kedere veya heyecana ma\u011flup olurken bulursunuz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hik\u00e2yemize e\u015flik eden ki\u015filer hep yan\u0131m\u0131zda olsun isteriz, insani duygular\u0131m\u0131za dayanarak. Bazen hayat ko\u015fullar\u0131 bazen hayat ko\u015fu\u015fturmalar\u0131 bazen de hayattaki tercihler buna m\u00fcsaade etmez. Yan\u0131m\u0131zda olmalar\u0131 kadar o s\u0131cakl\u0131\u011f\u0131 hissedemeyiz kimi zaman ama bir k\u0131\u015f g\u00fcn\u00fcnde sessizli\u011fe a\u00e7\u0131lan onlarca kap\u0131dan birinin anahtar\u0131n\u0131 elinde tutar foto\u011fraflar. Poz vermeye bile kalmadan \u00e7ekilen y\u00fczlerce an\u2019\u0131 ilmek ilmek dokuruz i\u00e7imize. Hat\u0131rlayamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z dakikalar i\u00e7in k\u0131zar\u0131z kendimize ve sonra k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir tebess\u00fcm belirir y\u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fczde, ko\u015farak telefonu al\u0131p aramak isteriz \u00e7ok uzak olmas\u0131na ra\u011fmen \u00e7ok yak\u0131n hissettirenleri. Zaman durmu\u015f gibi gelir, siyah beyaz kareler ge\u00e7er g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn \u00f6n\u00fcnden, duvar gibi y\u0131k\u0131lmaz dayanakt\u0131r onlar bizim i\u00e7in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Zihnimiz \u00f6yle g\u00fczel kurgular yazar ki bizim i\u00e7in bir foto\u011frafa bak\u0131p o sahneyi defalarca canland\u0131rmay\u0131 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn k\u0131lar iyi de olsa k\u00f6t\u00fc de olsa. \u0130\u00e7imizden \u015f\u00f6yle c\u00fcmleler ge\u00e7er: \u201cKe\u015fke an\u0131n tad\u0131n\u0131 daha fazla \u00e7\u0131karsayd\u0131m, daha \u00e7ok g\u00fclseydim, daha \u00e7ok gezseydim, daha \u00e7ok sar\u0131lsayd\u0131m, daha \u00e7ok e\u011flenseydik\u201d. Bu noktada ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z deneyimin somut halinin elimizde olmas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6z ard\u0131 ederiz ve ke\u015fkeler silsilesine yakalan\u0131r\u0131z. Tam da bu noktada hayat\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n her alan\u0131na s\u0131\u011fd\u0131ramad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ama bir foto\u011fraf karesine dizilen sevdiklerimizi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcp bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerden uzakla\u015fma e\u011filimi ya\u015fam\u0131n her evresinde kendi g\u00f6sterir.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u00d6te yandan, foto\u011fraf\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7ekmek istemedi\u011fimiz, unutmaya y\u00fcz tutmu\u015f bir s\u00fcr\u00fc an\u0131ya da sahibizdir. De\u011fil o foto\u011fraf\u0131 g\u00f6rmek tek bir an\u0131n karesini bile hat\u0131rlamak istemeyiz. Elindeki bir foto\u011frafa bak\u0131p saatlerini ge\u00e7iren, g\u00f6zya\u015flar\u0131na h\u00e2kim olmayan ve bu \u015fekilde ge\u00e7mi\u015fe kafa tutan an\u0131lar\u0131 zihnimizden \u00e7\u0131karamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z g\u00fcnler olur. Art\u0131k o foto\u011fraf karesindekiler bizim i\u00e7in her g\u00fcn g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fcz, tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ama bildi\u011fimiz y\u00fczler gibi gelir. Foto\u011fraftaki mutluluk, heyecan yerini derin bir keder, \u00fcz\u00fcnt\u00fc ve hayal k\u0131r\u0131kl\u0131\u011f\u0131na b\u0131rakm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r. Foto\u011fraf\u0131n \u00e7ekildi\u011fi yere gitmek, o anlar\u0131 tekrar canland\u0131rmak benli\u011fimizle aram\u0131zda derin u\u00e7urumlar olu\u015fturur. Belki foto\u011fraf\u0131 yok edebiliriz ama hissettirdiklerini \u00e7ok zor. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc derinlere usul usul i\u015fleyen, y\u0131llar\u0131n ge\u00e7ip gitmesine ra\u011fmen evrenin bir yerinde varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 koruyarak zaman\u0131 durduran tek \u2018an\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Her \u015feye ra\u011fmen k\u00f6t\u00fc deneyimler olabilir ama k\u00f6t\u00fc an\u2019lar\u0131n sonsuza dek ya\u015famas\u0131 \u00e7ok olas\u0131 gelmezdi k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fckken. \u015eimdi d\u00f6n\u00fcp bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131mda elimde kalan foto\u011fraflara, hepsi ayr\u0131 ayr\u0131 i\u00e7imi \u0131s\u0131t\u0131yor, baz\u0131lar\u0131na bak\u0131p tekrar g\u00fcl\u00fcyorum baz\u0131lar\u0131 g\u00f6zlerimi dolduruyor ama o foto\u011fraf\u0131n \u00e7ekilen an\u0131ndaki hislerim yerini hala koruyor. Sevdiklerime, tekrar ya\u015famak istedi\u011fim zamanlara, g\u00fcld\u00fcklerime ve heyecanlar\u0131ma bir foto\u011fraf kadar uzakm\u0131\u015f\u00e7as\u0131na.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Yazar:<\/em> \u0130pek Salman<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" \u201cBelki foto\u011fraf\u0131 yok edebiliriz ama hissettirdiklerini \u00e7ok zor. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc derinlere usul usul i\u015fleyen, y\u0131llar\u0131n ge\u00e7ip gitmesine ra\u011fmen evrenin bir yerinde varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 koruyarak zaman\u0131 durduran tek \u2018an\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":66,"featured_media":3869,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,4,1],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n